What did you buy from Satan today?

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—this is a friendly reminder that you have remembered not to buy stuff anymore. What did you buy today?

Did you buy gas for your SUV? Would you please consider trading that in now for something smaller to help the world improve and help us stop making the oil companies rich? Cuz, everytime I see your big honkin *kiss my ass* SUV, I am going to leave you a little note on the windshield. It’s not personal.

Did you buy Ceramics today? Wicker? Marble ? End tables? 3rd TV ?  5th bottle of perfume? 4th sweater?

May I ask you to stop doing that please? The more stupid shit we buy, the richer they get and the more power we all lose.

Would you be so kind as to get with the program and realize what is at stake here? If you get desparate, and have nothing to drape over your cold shoulders, you can always steal one of the flags off the coffins coming in from Iraq. A war we wouldn’t be in, if they didn’t have our money. If they didn’t have our money for the oil – for the wars – for the weapons, for the craft.

What did you buy yourself for Christmas? Take a good look at it. You’re staring up the ass of Satan. Maybe you would be fine with that —–then dedicating this year not to buy anymore useless stuff. Enjoy your new Satan (oops that’s SANTA) toys. Yeah, you didn’t know they are the same letters did you. They even carry the same numerical alignements.  Yeah, we’re kinda dumb.

Anyway- would you please think long and hard about how much you are willing to sacrifice?

No more buying stuff this year ok? Just this year ok? Then, we’ll see where we are.

Food, mortgage, electric, gasoline, water, trash, maybe cable.

When you are in the WalMart, or Bloomingdales, would you please stop and think?

If everyone in America matched your expenditure today, we could finance an entire war with Iran. So now you see how this is happening. We are at cause. It’s not them. IT’S US.

Now, you are worried because you know what will happen when the economy falls apart because people have stopped buying stuff. But, that is what is needed. Yes, eventually, you will lose your job. You will be in trouble. You may not have steaks in the fridge. You might have to eat Rice. You might have to turn down the heat and wear long sleeves. You might have to get a bike or actually walk somewhere. It will get bad. You might even die from it.

If you get depressed about any of the above; go visit Arlington National Cemetary – then their families.

Thanks much. Together, we can win. Otherwise, they will stick their bloody hands straight into our heart and rip out our souls. With our blind blessing.